World Gurning Championship (Egremont Crab Fair)

Pull the single most grotesque face you can manage, framed through an actual horse collar, in front of a crowd judging you purely on commitment to the bit. The World Gurning Championship has run at Egremont Crab Fair since the 1500s — the fair itself dates to 1267 — and reigning champions have defended their titles for decades, which tells you this is taken far more seriously by its competitors than the premise suggests it should be.

It's a small, friendly rural fair rather than a production — easy solo day trip from Whitehaven or Carlisle, free general admission, and gurning itself is free and casual to enter if you're feeling brave. There's essentially zero physical risk here unless you try the fair's separate greasy-pole climb, which is a different kind of dare entirely.

Worth knowing before you plan around it: the 2025 edition lost the organizers £17,000, and they issued a public sponsorship plea to keep the fair alive. September 2026 is confirmed and proceeding as planned, but a 759-year-old event running on a real funding shortfall carries genuine future risk — this might not be a fixture forever. Go see it while it's certain.